From: Lisa Cote [mailto: ljcote@snet.net ]
Sent: Friday, October 04, 2002 2:36 PM
Subject: Ben's update 10-4-02 ..please pray...

Hello everyone…

I had wished that if I did do another update this week that it would be with good news…I’m really in need of some good news at this point.  However, this isn’t good news.

Jeffrey and I met with one of Ben’s doctors who initially told us about his brain damage.  They had a pediatric neurologist look at Ben’s results this week and apparently the amount of brain damage is more extensive than they had originally thought.  The doctor said the damage was done “prenatal”  (before birth) and his brain did not get enough blood flow to it and therefore portions of both the left and right sections died off.  They called these areas “cysts” because they show up on the ultrasound as a bright “spot” – but they are not growths that can be removed.  When the neurologist looked at the pictures, he saw more areas than the original doctor had seen which basically means the amount of brain damage that Ben has is more significant now.  They will be doing a follow up ultrasound next week, just to keep an eye on things…but as his brain grows, the “spots” will grow as well and more may show up.  And there’s nothing they can do to stop it or make it better, which is really disappointing. 

What does this mean long term?  We asked that too.  It means that Ben will be handicapped but to what extent, we don’t know.  The possibilities are Cerebral palsy (which affects the motor skills), he could have problems with his hearing, with his eyes and learning disabilities as well.  We’ll know as he gets older.  He will have to have more extensive tests as he gets older including an MRI and will most likely need special care (even as soon as when he comes home from the hospital).

As the doctor talked I felt myself adding even more bricks to this wall I’ve built up around me.  I couldn’t wait to get away from her and just get back to visiting with Ben.  He looked so cute today – he was wide awake – his eyes wide open as if he knew Jeffrey and I were there and we needed him to be aware of us.  It’s hard to look at him and know the difficult road he has ahead of him.  I found myself thinking  - “If we all just pray harder or start focusing our prayers on his little brain maybe God will grant us a miracle!”  But I also know that I will take Ben whatever way God gives him to me.  He is such a gift already – look how many people he’s pulled together to rally around him!  People we don’t even know are praying for him. 

Anyway, I lit a candle for him today and will continue to do so every day for however long it takes.  Perhaps if you have a candle you could light it too – for Ben’s health and hope for his future.  If you are doing energy work on him, perhaps you could concentrate some of it on his little brain.   

Thank you all for your prayers and support and love,

Lisa Cote

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